Quick Halloween Costumes For a Lazy You

Hehe, I know, I know.

I kid. But you know what I mean?

Between the gazillion things we adults manage and juggle there will be years when we just don’t have the mental bandwidth to come up with something creative for the halloween party around the corner. The one that your well meaning friendly couple are hosting. You know, the ones who always seem to have it all together.

So, what do you do? Wear your old sweatshirt with dried food on it and go as “Mom” or stick your toddler on your hip and go as “Mommy and Sidekick” and wish folks actually think you took some trouble putting that together, until you realize you are not the only one who came up with that brilliant idea and there are a bunch of such “moms” anyway? Heh.

Ive been there and over the years have put together something the last minute. Okay, last 24 hours. All from what I own in the closet or used from years ago.

Here is my quick list of costumes for this Halloween, ones that look like you put some effort in them.

1. Zombie. 

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zombie-couple-halloweenEasiest ever, and not because we look like zombies without cleaning up, but it’s just so versatile.

  • All it really requires is you to wake up, tousle your hair some more or better yet, get your toddler to play with your hair.
  • Then use a few coats of that forgotten pancake makeup in your bathroom closet. Don’t be too careful with it. Just slap it all unevenly on the neck and face.
  • Don’t have any, no worries, just head to your kitchen pantry. Pull out any flour, add some food color to it, and make a paste. Lather it up. When it dries, you will scare yourself. It’s that good.
  • Then use a kohl/eyeliner and circle those eyes and again, as haphazardly as you can. They ultimately must look like dark pools or something that you burnt on the stove some day.
  • Use some red lipstick over your lips and for simulate bloody face/arms/etc.
  • Wear a shabby oversized sweat shirt, or borrow one from the husband.
  • Stick some socks into one of your sneakers and walk with an uneven gait. Done!

2. Lightning Victim 

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A friend once did this and the ease of it is mind-blowing. So, here’s what to do.

  • Get an old bad tee shirt. If it’s in tatters even better.
  • Light a match or an incense stick or you could even use a small lighter.
  • Bundle your tee in places and start a fire. Poke holes. Work on the edges first then make fat large holes in strategic places. (Obviously be careful, go outside etc etc)
  • Borrow some hair gel from your teenager and work some into parts of your hair and twist it up. No gel, no problem. Add a large teaspoon of salt in a cup of water and spray, soak your strands in. Twist them up and blow dry. Egg mix also works fine, but you will have the smell to bear it, so.
  • Stick one eyebrow up, use kohl or such
  • Wear that tee and walk around like you are dazed. You will also smell like one.
  • Done!

3. Frida Kahlo

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Yes! I actually put that together real quick one afternoon.

  • Raid your closet for some frilly blouse.
  • Collect all necklaces you have, borrow some if you have to.
  • Toss all your hair up and make two braids (if long enough) and cross them at the top of your head and pin down behind your ear. If hair is short, then find a headband and use.
  • Get some flowers. Dollar store ones are best. For a buck you get 6 flowers, whatever kind. Pull them apart and start sticking each into the braid or headband above you. Work in odd numbers.
  • Now use that eyeliner/mascara and connect your brows. Unibrow palooza!
  • Look like you are lost in your dreamy utopian world, and you are done!

4. Medusa

You’ll need green paint/makeup but any pale color will work, and also some pipe cleaners(and if you are a mom, you will have those pipe cleaners at home). Takes some 30 minutes

  • Paint your face with whatever shade you have. Green er the better
  • Use a fishnet stocking and apply a darker shade on to one side of your face or on forehead
  • Wear some bright red lipstick
  • Now do a ton of braids on your hair. Longer the better.
  • Take some red felt or pipe cleaners and work it into your braid ends. Twist the ends to stand up, like a snake lifting its head
  • Wear your shiniest outfit and go freeze the world!

5. Joker.

Ever so popular, Ive put this together the year the Batman (The Dark Knight) released, as did many others during halloween and I would like to humbly say I came close. 😉

  • Apply white makeup in patches. Bad and uneven.
  • Side part your part and make it scraggly, use salt water or the spray.
  • Use the dark eye makeup (as above) and smear it all around.
  • The lips and mouth is the one you pay attention to: So use your finest maroon/red lipstick and draw a line across and beyond your lips. Smudge it well, so the lines are not sharp.
  • Take the black liner and draw across them to look like they are sewn in together.
  • Wear a blazer/jacket and dress up nice.
  • The trick is in the crazed eyes and the gait. Watch the guy and how he rasps and talks and you are set!

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Remember, ANY halloween costume can be made scary with some creativity and white powder and some red lipstick. You don’t have to drum up $ at the store or buy expensive and exclusive costumes. My kids and I have bought just simple plain stuff and put the rest together. Over the years we have collected a prety large box of old costumes and props that we repeatedly use, just with slight changes.

Have a fun, safe halloween. It’s okay to be someone else and someone spooky once a while. Life is way short to be taking oneself so seriously 🙂

Enjoy!

 

 

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