25 and one q’s

I promised Monday Oct 20th and here they are. The answers to questions you asked me on my prompting.

  • Do you think that flossing is an important prelude to the intimate rendition of a romantic sonnet?

Not really. The saying ‘love is blind’ is incomplete. It should read ‘Love is blind and passion cares only for touch.’

  • When one of your children enters the house, can you tell from the footsteps which one it is? Can your husband?

Absolutely. Munchkin makes enough noise either complaining, tattling, or yelling ‘murder’ about the nearest living person next to her, the son whines that he’s either hungry or tired, and daughter doesn’t make a pip. Having an home alarm system helps a bit.

  • When one of your children falls down and bruises his or her shin do you yell at him her to be more careful or do you speak soothing words?

Depends on the kid. Son and daughter get yelled at first and then I get them a cookie, or make their favorite dish and hug them. They know better of course. Munchkin, I have no choice but to hug and be nice. Or else all hell would break loose. She makes sure of that. Drama queen that she is.

  • When your husband falls down and bruises his shin do you yell at him to be more careful or do you speak soothing words?

Neither. I raise an eyebrow. He will mope around and do a lot of drama. I then make him a grand dinner (which he shows signs of enjoying) and play doctor(which he’d hate visibly), and he’s one happy camper. Bruise? What bruise?

  • When your husband takes a route against your advice and ends up getting way too late for an important social engagement, do you “told you so?” or pro actively suggest that he has the mental abilities of a salamander?

*gasp, how dare i?* I sulk in silence. I am good at it. He gets the point but he is always right. Right?

  • Are you a Recipe-Seeker or Recipe-Creator or both?

I yearn to be a Seeker. It’s hard following rules. I start seeking and then I land creating. The result is the (mis) fortune of the person who gets to eat it.

  • Who is your fav kid among the three?

This is like asking which is your favorite eye. Unless you are heterochromiac , and you have a preference of blue over brown or vice versa, you can’t really choose now can you? If I had to, it would be very situational. I like to cuddle with munchkin as she’s the only one who lets me. If I need a task done and done right, daughter’s the favorite, and if I want a steady honest opinion on anything, the son’s the favorite. He’s brutal.

I like having normal funny, grown-up conversations with the son and the daughter. They prefer me that way than playing ‘mommy’ too.

  • First crush? celebrity and non.

First crush? I don’t really remember. I guess it would be Karthik of Mouna Ragam. No wait, it was Ravi Shastri ALL the way. God, how much of a heart hrob the dude was, especially that series when he won the Audi. Non celebrity could be the guy who lived in the upstairs apartment and I was about 13 or so. He was a grade higher and was quite cute looking. I used to be the only girl playing cricket with a bunch of boys (all neighbors and friends) and I looked forward to being on his team!

  • Suppose that your husband and you have a desi get together at a friend’s house at 6:00 pm. the location is an hour’s drive away. what time do you want to get ready? what about your husband? what if it is a non-desi get together? what if it is a temple gathering? what if it is a pooja at the temple?

Getting ready as in choosing, pressing the darn things, finding accessories and putting them on? Oh, the prep usually takes awhile. Once I do know what am wearing or rather what everyone else is wearing it’s a few minutes. So I’d say i would start panicking at 4.30, and be ready by 5.30. What? You said desi! It’s Indian Standard Time rt?

If it was non-desi, I’d be in the parking lot at 5.55 pm. Getting ready would be the same I guess, except that I’d have shopped for a long period of time. primarily coz the ridiculous stores don’t make anything my size! Just fro the model-sized 2’s and 4’s.

Temple gathering, pooja, all same. We’d be fashionably 10 minutes late, and these days I wear whatever fits me. Since that in itself shrinks the size of the closet considerably, choosing what to wear is breeze.

  • What outfit are you most comfortable in? Indian and non-Indian.

Indian: Sari. (am assuming if I have to step outside correct?)

Non-Indian: Jeans.

  • What does husband like you in best, and conversely what do you like yourself in best?

I wouldn’t know for a fact but certain non-verbal cues coming from the husband’s direction, tell me it’s the sari.

Me? Sari of course. It hides folds, fat, scars, stretch marks and more with elegance and and added bonus, people think “you’re oh so traditional despite being in USA”. What other outfit can do that?

  • Define “sexy”.

The way I see it? It’s a state of mind. It’s the whole deal. I don’t get this ‘eyes are sexy’ legs are ‘sexy’, it’s specific. Sexy is about the physical, the thoughts and the attitude behind the whole. Ultimately, I believe if you think sexy, you will be sexy.

  • What’s your cooking schedule for the day, like?

This was a funny one. Schedule eh? hmm.. Okay, I will give a straight answer. I believe in breaking a task down into dividable do-able chunks. Cooking is not a big deal as much as people like to make of it. Planning on what to cook is always the challenge. Just like you plan the bigger picture of your life, or even the way your day goes, planning on dinner can and will fall under the same umbrella if you allow it. I am not saying I’ve gotten it all under control, but it sure helps thinking that way.

Schedule varies. I come home and if am cooking south indian, then I start the daal and any veggies to be steamed in the cooker at 4. After doing one chauffering service, I come back and put the rice up, and finish up the stage II part of the daal and veggie. Adding tadkas, and wrapping it up. If it’s roti-daal/sabji, then I make the side dish the same way as above. Rotis are made during dinner time. If it’s non-desi, then it’s done around 6ish. No matter what I cook, I try and keep it simple. No elaborate recipes, prep during weekdays. With 4 stoves, no matter how hard you try, a simple dinner menu cannot take you longer than 30 minutes to make. ..and I sound like Rachel ray. 😀

  • Do you like asking or answering questions?

To be very honest, I don’t ask too many questions. In fact asking questions doesn’t come naturally to me, unless I force myself to. I am quite sure I was messed up as a child when my parents felt it was intrusive to ask questions of anyone, and that I should work with whatever I’ve been told. I don’t mind. I’ve been asked some very strange, personal intrusive questions. It amazes me how someone could do that and not feel like they were invading privacy.

  • What is your favorite color and why?

Doubt I have one favorite color. Blacks look best (wardrobe color choice) on anyone. I like it. Why? Coz that’s a color that I’ve heard more times in my life than I should have.

  • Who do you admire most in this world?

My grandma. Amazing lady, and no one can come close.

  • What have you done *today* to further whirled peas?

Well, I added them into an upma today. World peace? I didn’t fight with the husband. Small things matter. It was a peaceful day at home, through the kids activities, dance, FLL, dance and dinner. That itself is a huge contribution to reduce pollution (noise, visual, trash) and keeping sanity one more day helps make us better people. O yes, we (son and I and his team) even researched on our topic at FLL. CO2 emissions from cars and what we can do to reduce their effect on our climate.

  • What makes you so passionate about dance? What does it mean to you?

Why am I passionate? That’s a toughie. I like dance. It’s a rhythm I find peace in. I think I’ve always had it., just don’t remember or know the exact point when it took off. Being someone else while in the motion and tune of dance is an escape. Not being able to dance over the past couple of months has been depressing. A listless me has been moping around not able to move as much as I can.

  • Is bad a bad word ?

er. no. It isn’t. I am sure there’s a context here somewhere and am thinking what it can be. In an educational setting, using ‘bad’ is not encouraging. In telling the restaurant that the dish sucked, and is bad, is perfectly okay.

  • What’s your take on “Nothing comes for nothing. But how much is enough”

It’s true. There’s no free lunch. You have to put in some effort to get something. In some cases, some have to put in more effort to gain the same benefits as opposed to someone else who puts in just half the effort. it’s not fair, but that’s the way it’s balanced out I guess.

It’s never enough. There’s always a next mountain to scale. It takes wisdom to know when you have reached your pinnacle in terms of achievements and needs. Most have it. Some lose it and go fall off the cliff.

  • What’s the best compliment you’ve received so far abt your dance performances?

It’s funny, but today at class, one little 6-7 year old was watching me teach a bunch of kids. I obviously can’t jump much, but the ruthless person that I am, was barking and throwing instructions at them and basically tiring them out with straightening postures, and expecting clarity in what they were doing. At the end of it, this kid walks up to me and says “Did you learn dance?” I said “Yes.” To which she said “You dance so well.” I laughed (coz I didn’t really dance, but just moved around showing how certain postures held), but it was one very unpretentious lovely thing coming out of a child’s mouth. She may not know the intricacies, but the fact that she could arrive at a judgment was heartening.

In ’03, a mastergaru came from India and we had learned a specifically complicated item. Up until then I was just another mommy amidst gorgeous teen girls in size 0 and 2 who danced like the wind and expressed themselves intensely. After I performed, he came up to me and told me “I am very proud of you as my student.” (Those were his literal words, in English) He was a relentless strict teacher and praise of that kind was rare. Then there was this incident this summer (13). Each have been turning points and much needed encouragements.

Not to undermine the average audience, but the most valued opinions and criticism comes from people pure at heart. The children and then the gurus.

  • What was the first dish that you cooked for your husband and what was his reaction and expression after he tasted the first bite?

This is a funny. It’s long too. Okay, in Brussels, we stayed at a small flatotel (motel with a kitchenette) for the first few weeks. After a few days of eating out, I decided I can cook. Electric stove and well, I really didn’t know how to cook. I bravely tried liquid. Some Pulusu -Kozhambu/stew sorts. I had no idea how much of that tam paste I could use, so generously dumped a hefty teaspoon. I think I spent the whole afternoon nursing it and coaxing it to turn the shade I’ve seen it should be at home. It stayed black. Completely disappointed I hid it and made some potato fry instead. We started ‘dinner’. After a bit of hemming, I told him about this pot of blackness I’d created. He laughed for a while, and then told me that the taste wasn’t too bad, and that the color would stay that way anyways. The question he asked me after was “More importantly are you able to eat what you cooked?” To which I had no choice but to say “yes!”

  • Have you ever thought about enrolling for salsa classes with your husband?

No way! Getting us to do a dandiya without beating each other up is stress enough. Doubt I’d want us that close and swaying. We’d just end up with broken bones.

  • If you were banned from blogging, what would your last post be on?” or extending the same to miss-universe-genre q, “what is that one thing you want to do badly and be remembered, like open dance academy or world travel..?”

Banned from blogging? *gasp. Why’d anyone do that to me? Gosh! So yes, what would I say? I’d say “Thanks for playing, see you in another avatar!”

One thing to be remembered for? Just being me? I don’t feel the need or urgency to want recognition by establishing something. If I do it would be because I want to do it, not for remaining engraved in people’s hearts. If am lucky, folks will remember me for a few weeks, if am not, it will be a few days. Either way, the world and people are always changing, looking for new things to excite, interest and challenge them. After all, we are all mortals, and that is the way it should be anyway.

Via email that I didn’t check so adding it on:

  • Do you like the person who gives you a straight opinion/answer however rude that may be or would you prefer someone to kinda make the answer beautiful, add some chocolates and all the while hide the crap! (Its an either/or question – There is no part of this and part of that)

Sure. Straight’s good. It is the right thing to do. Then again, the value that the answer deserves, the situation and most importantly the way you say ‘no’ or ‘you suck’ matters. It’s called ‘Being sensitive’. ..and no, chocolates, and flowers cannot mend a heart that’s broken by rude words. Sometimes the crap’s worth hidden if it doesn’t make a difference in the first place.


Thank you!

ps: reading them in the light of day and I ask a question. “Could I be any more pompous?” 😐 *hides head in shame and runs off waiting for the day to pass so she can write more such idiotic posts and finish the stupid month of October.”

Links at end of post are a sign. “How to be a better wife” and “Respect your husband = Not nagging” – I deserve this.

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20 replies on “25 and one q’s”
  1. says: Praveen

    @ sthitapragnya: Exactly!!! I could visualise Rads addressing a crowd that is looking at her with eager eyes. 😀

    @ Rads: that was an interesting read. thanks for including my questions 🙂

  2. says: maxdavinci

    more seems like the press function after someone wrote a book. Or wait arvind adidga also wouldn’t answer so many qs!

    en iniya tamil makkale types….

    anyways was nice to know something abt u, so i likes…

  3. says: bApHoMEt

    @ “This is like asking which is your favorite eye.”: Very well put madam.

    It seems that when you are pushed into a tight corner, you become more cute [sic].

  4. Cool answers.

    Mouna Ragam Karthik is a nice choice. But Ravi Shastri! That is one thing I really didn’t understand, why women used to like him a lot. He used to make 10 runs of 60 balls. We used to call him Dok Master.

  5. says: rads

    Dinesh: Thanks. Nope, you wouldn’t understand either. He was a cutie!

    Baph: Thank you, well, it is hard to choose, though am sure favorites exist, they aren’t a whole by any length.

    Max: yea sure, one person says, all of you gumbalogumbal say it :p
    You’ve heard of the saying “empty vessels make most noise” rt? Yeah.

    Neha: So what you saying? We have different eras? :p

    Praveen: Of course 🙂

    Stitha: gee, thanks for the ‘press conf’ reference. Now I feel like a wannabe loser celeb. :p

  6. I read this post while I was brushing my teeth this morning (TMI, I know), and the boy gave me one raised eyebrow look. I couldn’t put it down, so I kept reading. And then he tells me, if I knew you were going to treat your iPhone so badly, I would have never let you get one! So I hmphed as I listerined the vague ends of my mouth, and managed an early morning pout that said “But I’m reading Rads”, to which he said – who is this Rads person? You seem to be more interested in her life than you are ever about mine, and pouted and hmphed and walked out. Victory shall be mine! I had my bathroom to myself! 😀

  7. says: bookworm

    very interesting Rads! I’d like to answer one of them though. I interpreted it this way…

    Do you like asking or answering questions?
    I like asking questions. I hate talking about myself. Other people’s lives seem much more interesting.

  8. says: Dee

    Hi Rads,
    I read your blogs occationally and what interests me most is you have a great attitute (in a good way :)). I love the way you juggle between your kids, work and home without complaining too much. Keep’em coming..

  9. says: Saagar

    Both my questions had philosophical element and I guess you missed at least one. If bad is not a bad word, then how can u state a word as bad to signify that it is not good. If bad couldnt stand for what it represents, using it wouldnt necessarily signify the essence of that particular word. Same is the case with life…

  10. says: Adithya

    Karthik of Mouna Raagam was quite like Hrithik of Kaho Naa Pyaar Hai, right? I remember my mom talks about him and his New college buddies frequenting a restaurant that my mom also used to go to. During mom’s first year or something. He was quite the cool dude in college too, apparently…

  11. says: jaya

    super cool post. karthik ok mouna ragam, i think he was cute. i like Ravi shastri but kinda had a crush on Azhar and it all evaporated the day he divorced his wife.

  12. says: rads

    boosmom: Thank you, Azhar was cool too! I rem his first century. 🙂

    Adithya: Yep, teen love! 😀

    Saagar: Oh, okay. 🙂

    Dee: Okay, I better make sure the husband doesn’t read this, coz he’d have the best laugh f his time 🙂

    bookworm: Don’t we all? Just being an energizer bunny does not mean interesting too rt? 🙂

    Schmetterling: LOL! The poor guy! He must hate me now! But as long as you are laughing, it’s all good! 😀

  13. says: WT

    fun read! and Rads, you sound just like my Mom w.r.t Ravi Shastri.:D what ever happened to the QB, btw? (oh bebo=blue-eyed boy)

  14. says: rads

    WT: Gee thanks, what’s with you and Adithya? Plotting and drawing parallels between me and your moms! Have no idea why you kids read me in the first place! ;-p

  15. Enjoyed this press conference. Faves – “No way! Getting us to do a dandiya without beating each other up is stress enough. Doubt I’d want us that close and swaying. We’d just end up with broken bones.”

  16. says: rads

    Naren: You too! Perhaps you should do such a press meet too. You’d be flooded :p

    CW: What?! ..and die answering them? was already running out of words to say, I’d just put up a board “Closed until further notice”

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