Alright, so you see that picture of that delicious looking Indonesian Peanut saute? That was my lunch a few days back.
I hop over to Noodles and Co, and order my usual. It’s always mostly either this or Pad Thai. I also add “make it spicy”. The lovely lady nods and I hand in my card.
She says “Name?”
Me: “Put me down as Rads“
She: *Suspiciously looks at me and then the card and then back at me.*
Me: *I raise an eyebrow.*
She: “Is it okay if I put in the name on the card?”
Me: “Sure, as long as you can say it right?”
She: “Yeah.” *dutifully types in my 7 letter – distinctly difficult or so it seemed – name.*
The labored typing and the glancing back and forth between the keyboard and the card gave it all away. That’s how I knew. Just saying, in case you were wondering.
I wait along with a colleague. She’s ordered the same dish too. A Russian originally, being with me for 3 years has made her palate more Indian than Russian. Yes, am proud. Noodles lady #2 walks up to the counter where there are 4 of us waiting, including one older lady with a mop of auburn hair in the style of Katherine Hepburn, and a young gentleman who looked like he graduated school over the summer.
She: *dragging every syllable out in the most painful excruciating way possible*
Me: “Er, Rads?”
She: *Blinks. raises the bag and asks me to read off the bill.*
Me: I read and then say “Yea, that’s me. It really isn’t that hard?!” *saying it out slowly*
She: Gives me a snicker that almost amounts to saying “do I look like I care?” ..and then says aloud “Indonesian?“
Me: Excuse me? No, no, Indian.
She: “I meant the dish, you ordered; Indonesian Peanut Saute?”
Me: Going very red that outshone the pink shirt I wore and grit my teeth and say “yes“
I scuttle away with a shred of whatever dignity I could manage to scoop from the floor, knowing full well that the kid’s laughing behind my back, and the Noodles lady’s filed this memory away in the *weird customers that I have to deal with on a daily basis and all I get is $10fikkinbucks* club folder, so she could regale them all which she’d meet in the evening.